With writing comes expectations – mine, my agent’s, my editor’s, my readers’…
With writing comes the idea that at some point, I’ll have to go over every single sentence and read it again and again to make it perfect. And then turn it into my editor and start that process again. There are days when that process feels EXHAUSTING.
With writing comes the pressure of – Will this be good enough? Will anyone want to read this? Am I doing all this work to write crap?
Sometimes I waste time on the internet to avoid writing.
Sometimes I set my timer and make myself write, and I wonder WHY I don’t do that all the time because the words fly, and I can’t get enough.
Sometimes I set my timer to write, and then decide that laundry is more important.
There are days when the ideas rattling around in my head are fighting to get out, and days when anxiety over all the above issues, keeps those stories in.
Once in a while I’m so frustrated with any wasted minutes I’ve taken and not been writing, and other days I see those minutes as part of the process.
But that’s what I come back to every. single. time.
It’s part of the process.
Like it or not
– I won’t always feel like writing.
– I will always think of the perfect solution to a problem in my story at the worst possible time.
– There will be days when I’d rather clean my house than open my computer (my house would be cleaner if that happened more often).
I think what it comes down to is that I need to not be hard on myself. I need to try and remember that it is ALL a process that moves me forward – EVEN ON THE DAYS I DON’T WRITE (which happens more in the summer than in the winter…)
So, I guess that’s what’s been on my mind this summer and why I haven’t blogged much. I want to spend time with my kids. I want to REElax. I want to play.
And yes. My goal is to be less hard on myself when I don’t get done what I want to get done. My other goal is to remember that ALL the ups and ALL the downs are just part of the process of writing a book, and it’s not an easy one, and that’s okay…
When I remember that, I can sit back and find something I love about my current WIP, and that keeps me writing and keeps me excited about writing.
What I love most about my current YA project is that I’ve really, REALLY plotted it out and watching the story slowly come alive from months of planning has been an amazing experience.
So now I gotta know – What do you love most about what you’re working on now?
PS My Kirkus review for STRONGER THAN YOU KNOW went live this morning, and I’m thrilled. Here’s a snip – “Perry deftly avoids the problem-novel label thanks to complex characters and a well-structured plot. Joy’s story is very affecting, and her voice is suitably self-effacing without being ostentatious; most readers will be engrossed. For those not quite ready for Ellen Hopkins, this novel is a good choice.”